So I'm really struggling today. My spirit is low. And I have to just continuously remind myself what I'm doing and why. So to refocus myself, I decided to work on Larry's Christmas gift. A year's worth of dates with yours truly (that's me!).
The plan is to enroll him in possibly a date of the week club of some sort. Just a little cutesy paper that says by accepting the terms, he'll be mailed an invitation weekly, along with the plans to a great date catered specifically for him. The only cost to him is the time required to fulfill the dates. And if he acts FAST, and accepts within the next HOUR, then 12 of those dates will be a SUPER date. Out of the house, sure to please, fun filled date. (Any listeners out there that is great with words... feel free to help me out!)
I also have already made a "love journal" for us to write back and forth to each other. Hopefully this is where we'll put our love notes to each other, reminisce about our dates, etc. I'll design a mailbox or an old suggestion box to put the notebook in when one of us has written in it. Put the flag up and we'll know that love is just a box away. (Pictures of these to come soon!)
So anyway... back to planning dates. Some are easy enough. My plan is a date a week (say every Tuesday night since the man works on weekends). All but one of these dates will take place at home. My children are already aware that this is in the works. They also know that on Tuesdays, when applicable, they can help me decorate and prepare (Larry will be home.. I'm still trying to figure out how to make it happen without his being involved...). AND They also know that Tuesday is a 7pm bed time. They are welcome to go to their rooms and watch tv, etc. But they WILL go to bed at 7. On our dates, I've kinda sorta got a plan going on:
- I have a "travel date", where we will spend the night in a foreign location... Belize (the man has always wanted to go there), Greece, the Wild West, etc. (These will all take place in my house, of course.. so decorarting will be KEY)
- On one night I have a sentimenty (yes I think I just made that word up) type date that will be perfect to put in our notebooks.
- One night a month is more active in theory.. game night, picnic outside, etc.
- Then there is the 1 special a month date. My plan is to have my parents watch my kids overnight on those nights. They are old enough to stay alone, but this lets us stay out as long as we desire without worrying over the kids. We can just focus on each other.
Right now my biggest difficulty is coming from trying to actually plan these. (of course!) It's just my husband and I are soo different in the things we need out of a relationship. I've been browsing tons of online ideas, and I love them. Sooo many great suggestions out there!!! But many of the "quick ideas" just don't think will work with Larry. He can't handle a lot of physical touch. It's not that he just doesn't like it... he is so hypersensitive that a massage, etc is not a good idea. And physicality is just not an important aspect for him. He doesn't enjoy kissing. He likes to hold hands... that's kind of the extent of it. (Don't get me wrong... he loves.. umm "intimacy". But it's not like a "normal guy" myth thingy where you just mention getting lucky and he's excited and waiting in bed for you. It's just not top priority with him. Actually..now that I think about it... I think our roles are reversed... when it comes to that *I* am the one with more of the typical man mentality, and he's the one with the "I'm tired" excuses! HAHA)
And in saying all that, I'm trying to make sure that all our dates are geared with HIM in mind. Not me. And wow. That's hard. I'm also trying to decide... do I share my ideas now or as we do them?? or both? :D